Wednesday, March 15, 2006

morning coffee




I went to Tim Hortons
for my Iced coffee this morning.
There was a line.

There’s this freakish couple at the counter.
I’m assuming it was husband and wife..
The guy had thick glasses, thick unkempt beard, mustache, bad hair
wearing brown cords and tan walking sneakers. Yeah, he was hot.
Then we have the “wife” frizzy hair, dim-witted expression, dirty stained red coat.

So the guy is standing there, just staring at the donuts as if this decision is the biggest decision of his life.

I think to myself.
JUST PICK A FUCKING DONUT!!! JUST PICK ONE!!! DO YOU WANT ME TO PICK IT FOR YOU???
LEMON!!! NOW MOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!

The wife is walking back an forth looking up at the menu.

I take my two dollars out of my pocket
Because I’m “Ready to Order” A Quarter falls out of my pocket in the process.

It makes that clangy change falling on the floor sound.

Apparently this sound awoke dirty red coat out of
her menu induced coma
She turns and heads straight for the quarter.

I think for a split second .. well maybe she's going to hand it to me.

WRONG

Dirty red coat picks up MY Quarter and then begins to place MY quarter into HER dirty red change purse

SHE STOLE MY QUARTER

I PANIC...no way... that’s MY QUARTER that I need to BUY MY COFFEE that costs $2.05

I look at her and say... “I think that’s umm...”

She looks at me and says
“OH is that yours?? I drop change all the time.”

Why am I not surprised that she drops change all the time.

5 comments:

Mostskillz said...

LOL - That is the most hilarious story. Thanks for making my morning. =)

Lucky it was only a quarter and not a child, maybe she would've tried to take the kid, "Oh, I drop my kids all the time."

Goggles Piasano Ritardo said...

Funny story. I want donuts and coffee now dammit.

The Team said...

You kidding me? That's ridiculous...

Side Note:
I had just posted something on my blog about "morning coffee," so I had to read your entry... I think your tale bested mine...

So did she ever give the quarter back?

Jen said...

LOL
Surprisingly Yes, she did hand it over.

Joe said...

I just had a dream last night about a donut shop...you have mysterious powers CS!

I have a post office story of similar observational acuity. This would be a good subplot in a Seinfeld episode. I’m thinking Elaine loses the quarter and red coat keeps it…a fight breaks out…the cops are called…and in the jail cell all they have to eat are donuts.

They cost 25 cents each…