an email
Today I emailed my friend Angela this:
"Stop working and talk to me.."
And this is the reply I got:
Okay. :) Once upon a time there was a fat girl, with fat arms. They called her
"Fat Arms Ang" Her arms were so fat that they did not fit in a regular sized
shirt, so all of her shirts had to be modified to fit her gigantic arms. At night,
her children slept upon her flabby gilatnous arms as though they were pillows.
Her husband used them to jack up the car on weekend repair jobs. One day, a
giant mosquito came and feasted upon just one of the fat arms and deflated it
like a balloon, and for the rest of her days she was no longer called Fat Arms
Ang... she was called: Fat ARM ang because just one of the arms remained
grotesquely yooj.
The end.
I'm embarrassed. I've exposed my vulnerability. I'm naked in front of you all - with my fat flabby vanilla beef bats flapping in the wind like a god damn sail.
ReplyDeletePerhaps another snack would help.
how bout some gingerbread?
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA....
ReplyDeleteOkay.
And what was your reply?
ReplyDeleteCan Angela or Ang come and work with me?
ReplyDeleteShe needs a nougie.
ReplyDeleteI think she can get workman's comp for the deflated arm.
ReplyDeleteSkylers Dad - I replied
ReplyDelete"I'm posting this"
Dale - YES!
Animal - she certainly does..
Lynda - nope, they rejected her..
sad, really
That (sniff, sniff) was the saddest (sniff) story I have ever heard. (Bwwwwaaaaaaa, sniff)
ReplyDeleteI'll be alright, everyone. Don't you cry for me...
ReplyDelete...Three more snickers bars and this will all be a bittersweet memory.
Nice spelling of "yooj," Angela. Very creative! :)
ReplyDeleteHey, listen. I'm italian. It wouldn't be right if I spelled it any other way. Mmkay? so, Fuggettabahtit.
ReplyDeleteIf I knew you were all of a sudden going to be naked in front of us, you could have at least given us some fair warning so we could be prepared. Just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteAnytime you need me to stop working and email you, just let me know. My arms are normal sized but I have other physical deformaties.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHHAHAHA "I have other physical deformaties."
ReplyDelete