Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku










And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -


This Weeks Haiku Brought to you by 2Fools

Thanks for the cookies
Like I haven't had enough
They aren't even good


Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables


Monday, December 29, 2008

random find


This looks tasty!
Oh wait...
NO - IT DOESN'T


an email

And now
an email I received this morning
from my friend
Angela a.k.a 2fools

enjoy...




Hi, Jen - How was your Christmas? Did you get anything nice?
We had a nice Christmas - it was nice. Yeah...
It's the days leading up to Christmas that are fun, you know?
Picking that perfect gift for your special someone...I think I did pretty well.
Here's what I got for my sweetheart:
An Ipod - Nano w/ hard case and extended warranty $220
Clothes - $100
Car stuff (jumper cables, etc.) $50.00
Harley Davidson engine model kit $40.00
Glass *ahem* "tobacco" pipe $35.00
"tobacco" $50.00
One-hitter (whatever that means) $10.00
Massaging Slippers $20.00
Lots and lots of stocking stuffers $whoknows.
Here's what I got:
A new coat: Size 2XXL (Woman)
("I picked it up and said, "Oh yeah, that'll DEFINITELY fit her)
1 bottle of shampoo
1 bottle of conditioner
1 bottle of nail polish remover
2 bottles of nail polish
(I haven't had nails since I started playing guitar when I was 17
- and I don't paint my nubbins)
1 .99 cent key chain.
Thanks... I LOVE it. Douchebag.
As you can see the meaning of Christmas
is still intact at our house.

mom

And now
a story my mom shared with me
on December 24th


Mom:
"So you'll get a laugh from this one,
I had just got done cutting up the fudge I made
and putting it in dishes for everyone...

(Actual Fudge)

There were little fudge trimmings all over...
a piece was on the knife and I ate it.

There was a little piece on the plate and I ate it.

There was another piece on the counter and I ate it.

Then I saw a little piece near the sink
and I put it in my mouth...

But this time it wasn't fudge...
It was a piece of Cesar sliced beef dog food
that must of fell off of poodle's dog dish

Blllleeeeechhhhhh - I can still taste it - it was awful!!!

I'm done eating fudge for a while..."

My mom ate poodle food on Christmas Eve
*cringe*

The End.



I hope all you kids had a good Xmas!!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

jesse


Trukindog & Jesse
Need Your Vote

Vote for Jesse!
go here

Friday, December 26, 2008

clip of the day


Clip of the day
GO HERE

I laughed.

slack movie review


OKAY...
MOMENTS AGO
I JUST FINISHED WATCHING

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

I didn't go see it when it came out because I had no interest
I knew they would never be able to pull it off
I avoided it... I read no reviews - I heard it wasn't that good
then I forgot about it
- Never actually knowing anything about the story line-

A few months back I had seen an episode of South Park

"The China Probrem" Episode 1208 (Original Air Date: Oct 8, 2008)
to be precise
In which Kyle is traumatized by memories of watching
"Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull"
over the summer,
saying the movie essentially "raped" their action-hero icon.

I was curious - How bad is it?!?!
So I Netflixed it

But..
I don't think I was prepared for what I just saw

Here is my reaction:
*Shocked look on my face*

At the point when Shia Labeouf starts swinging
through the trees like a monkey

*Throw my hands up in the air*
"Oh, just shut it off!! - I don't think I'm gonna make it through
the entire thing, shut it off!! Shut it off!!"

BUT WE PRESSED ON...


"But how could they...?"
"But why would they...?"
"Noooo...?"
"Really??....REALLY???
"What were they thinking...?"
"WHY??!?!?! OH, FOR FUCKS SAKE WHY?!?!"

*ANGER*
**Spielberg & Lucas you no good sons of bitches!!!
I hope you're happy!!!!**


*Disgust * Sadness * Outrage*


As I slid the netflix disk back into
the envelope
I imagined a tear falling from my eye
in slow motion
dropping on the on to the dvd
just before I seal it shut


I'm sorry Indiana
I'm sorry they raped you.


What a piece of shit.





This has been a Casual Slack
Movie Review

Thank You & Drive Safe



Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Friday, December 19, 2008

Last Minute Gift Ideas

Well kids
it's that time of year again..
LAST MINUTE Christmas shopping

Don't know what to buy??
Here is my annual list of exceptional gift ideas
that will help lessen the stress
this holiday season

you're welcome


One of those Blankets with Sleeves
nothing is more masculine..

Father Murphy
Complete DVD Box Set
a gift they will cherish

Unicorn Blacklight Poster
for that special someone in your life
It's pretty fucking magical if you ask me


An autographed picture
of Rue McClanahan
a classic gift - you can't go wrong with




I'm glad I could help
Merry Christmas


I miss...

Does anyone remember
Trident fruit-flavored gum?
It came in an orange package,
and the gum was light orange in hue.
The flavor was similar to Juicy Fruit
but BETTER

It was my favorite gum...
but it was discontinued
of course!


I miss it
Just Sayin'


Thursday, December 18, 2008

WORST Gift Ever

one of my WORST Gifts Ever

I was a kid..
maybe 3rd grade...

from my "Aunt Judy"
(my fathers sister) I rarely saw her..

the package was an unusual shaped box
it sat under the tree for a week
and It was killing me!! What could it be?!?!?

Christmas morning -
I couldn't wait!!

I tear it open only to discover a pair of
ORANGE LEG WARMERS

the disappointment was overwhelming


what was YOUR worst gift ever?



superholidayextravaganza.blogspot.com

random find

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

riley vs. travis

more pics from my husbands iphone...

the king and his castle

leave...

me..

ALONE!

riley

my husband emailed me this pic
and I thought I'd share..

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku











And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -


This Weeks Haiku Brought to you by Miss Alex

Rainy Cloudy Day
Warm in Bed with Soft Blanket
Holy Shit I’m late

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables


Friday, December 12, 2008

clip of the day


Don't Stop
Believin...

Clicky Here

Grand Opening

A New Day - A New Blog
A Fonzie Sox & Slack Collaboration
Enjoy...

Thursday, December 11, 2008

similarities

I had a pic of my cat Riley
on my screen at work..

My boss walked by
and said there was a shocking similarity
to a famous Marilyn Monroe pic

So we placed them side by side

You be the judge...





Wednesday, December 10, 2008

guest post

And now boys & girls
another outstanding guest post
from the great 2fools

enjoy....


Dear Jen:
I bet your readers didn't know you were a stalker.
But, I, as your ever-present co-conspirator, shall enlighten them.
The year is 1985. Jen and I, who have nothing better to do over
winter vacations, weekends, and after school, but to crank call every
one and their brother.
Yes, folks, Jen and I were the original Jerky Boys.
Jen, ever the brilliant director, would force me at gun point
to call different businesses in the area, Almacs Supermarket, Kinkos,
restaurants, you name it...
"Ask 'em if they have flavored mayonnaise!
- Ask how to make potato salad!
- Do it! And do the voice, do the voice!"

We taunted everyone we could possibly think of, up to and
including local radio station personality "Tony M"
We pinned down his work schedule and would call him on
all of his shifts to request songs and make him say
"This is going out to JEN AND ANGELA
in (our hometown), Rhode Island" - We called him so often that
he eventually would chat with us on the phone his entire shift,
putting us on hold to do his announcements.

We were FLIRTING - each of us developed a slight crush on him
until he invited us (or we won tickets to) the Radio Station
Sponsored Haunted House, to which he brought his wife "SOFIE"
We were so appalled, first that he brought his wife
(though we were all of 13 years old), second because she was a
hideous monster with a great big mole on her face.
He wasn't so hot himself. HAHAHA

If you think that's bad, that lady from the Golden Girls, Betty White
did a commercial for some dog food called "Science Diet"
There was an 800 number you could call to get a free sample of
dog or cat food. So, Jen and I would call over and over and over and
over and over again giving the same address, but different names
- REALLY STUPID ONES like:
Francis Buttercorn
Donnie Marie Melucci-ConCarne
Dana Bixby
Shananana Baxter-Burney
Biscuit O'Shea

Jen and I had dog food piling up outside the mailbox.
My father, the shirtless wonder, came in the house one day and said,
"IS THIS YOU??? FRANCIS BUTTERCORN???
ARE YOU SENDING DOG FOOD TO THIS HOUSE???
THATS FUCKING MAIL FRAUD
- DO YOU WANT ME TO GET ARRESTED?!?!?!?!"
I did want him to get arrested. But that's not why we did it.
We did it because we could.

I have received every free sample you can possibly think
of from tampons to condoms, adult diapers and denture cream,
all under thousands of aliases we created. Just last year my mail man
said to me, "Hey - I kept bringing all this mail back to the post office
thinking it was going to the wrong house. Then it occurred to me...
these names can't be real... this must be some private joke thing...
so I figured I oughtta deliver it." So, I explained it to the mailman
- who until I moved called me "Harriet Pigman".


We will never grow up. Never.

random find


If anyone needs the pattern
to make MC Hammer pants...
It's right here

You're welcome


Tuesday, December 09, 2008

honeycomb

I always hated
this ugly fuck
on the honeycomb box

What the hell is it anyway?
Male or Female
any ideas?

I was never a big fan of
Honey Comb Cereal...
How bout you?

And We Can't Forget
That Lame Ass Commercial!!!!!!!!!!

It's not small.. no- no- no

I hate his name

"Dick Van Patten"
is 80 today

I just thought
everybody should know

on a side note:
is that not the worst name ever?

Monday, December 08, 2008

Sunday, December 07, 2008

just some turkeys

counted 19 in the yard yesterday
(our world record is 24)



I like this one


They're Everywhere


Saturday, December 06, 2008

Friday, December 05, 2008

yummy

We ordered the BIG Beer tonight
and it was everything that we thought it could be.


Thursday, December 04, 2008

link of the day


I dig this site!
Check it...

See How Your State Rates - Here

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

link




very cool
vintage celebrity photos
clicky here


<--- Sean Connery

random find

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku










And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -


This Weeks Haiku Brought to you by 2Fools

Picking up dog shit
would be better than this job
...and pay better, too.

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables


Monday, December 01, 2008

random find

Here are some ideas
of what to get me for Xmas...


- click on pic for larger version-

I always did want that Play Doh Barber Shop...


just some pics

Saturday...
we went on a seal watch
Newport, RI


Rose Island Lighthouse
we went on a tour..
"Rose Island was used during World Wars I and II
as part of the Navy Torpedo Station where explosives were stored.
After World War II this use ceased and the island
(except for the Lighthouse) was declared surplus by the Government."



"Inhabitants of Narragansett Bay from October through April.
Each fall, harbor seals migrate south from Maine and the Atlantic Provinces
of Canada following their prey to the warmer waters and protected harbors
of Narragansett Bay.
Harbor seals are the most commonly seen marine mammal
in New England.
"


HARBOR SEALS & GRAY SEALS


Nice View of the Newport Bridge



the end