Sunday, December 31, 2006
Saturday, December 30, 2006
I've been busy doing nothing on my vacation
this was in the newspaper this morning...
New Year’s Eve: Why do we do this weird stuff?
thought I would share...
• Times Square: At 11:59 p.m. they drop the big crystal ball amidst revelry by a million or more people jammed into the square for hours, with lots of drinking and no apparent place to
go to the bathroom. Did you ever wonder about that?
• South Africa: In the Johannesburg suburb of Hillbrow, it’s customary to throw refrigerators, beds and trash bins out of tall buildings. And to set off fireworks horizontally, aimed at the windows of neighboring buildings.
• Scotland: In a tradition called “fireball swinging,” locals fashion big balls out of chicken wire, tar, paper and other flammable materials, set them afire and walk through pedestrian-jammed streets swinging them on ropes. ANDY? do you partake in this activity?
• Atlanta: They drop a peach. Wimps.
• America: We sing “Auld Lang Syne,” an arcane poem by Scotsman Robert Burns. Sure, you can handle the first verse. Now have three glasses of bubbly and try singing the third:
“We twa hae paidl’d in the burn,”
“Frae morning sun till dine,”
“But seas between us braid hae roar’d,”
“Sin auld lang syne.”
• In the Philippines, children jump up and down at midnight to make sure they will grow tall. Hours later, sensors warn of tsunami waves around the Pacific Rim.
• The World: Anyone born Jan. 1 is dubbed a “New Year Baby.” Among the more famous: Pope Alexander VI, Barry Goldwater, Betsy Ross, J. Edgar Hoover, Xavier Cugat, Joe MacDonald of Country Joe and the Fish and Kala Sosefina Mileniume Kauvaka.
• Tonga: What, you don’t know Kala? She was the first child born in the new millennium. (To be fair, the deck was stacked since Tonga’s so close to the International Dateline.)
• Spain: They eat 12 grapes as the clock strikes midnight. Those Spaniards know how to party, don’t they?
• In Turkey, a traditional New Year’s Day feast food is turkey. This is not a pun in the Turkish language. If you see a Turk, try to explain it to him. (If he gets the joke, shake his hand and say, “Ataturk.”)
• Greece: They make St. Basil’s Cake, hiding a gold coin inside. Whoever finds the coin has good luck in the coming year. Or breaks a tooth and sues.
• The American South: We eat “Hoppin’ John” — black-eyed peas and ham hocks — for luck. If we were even luckier, we’d have caviar and champagne.
• The World: From Coney Island to Russia, thousands of portly, nearly naked, probably intoxicated men cut holes in the ice and jump into the frigid water. Of all the things the whole world could unite on ...
• Iran: At Norouz, the Zoroastrian New Year, which actually falls on March 21 in ’07, it’s customary to serve pastry with “Ajileh Moshkel Gosha,” which translates as “problem-solving nuts.” (Fill in your own punch line here. See if you can relate it to the nuclear standoff.)
• France: New Year’s Eve is celebrated with a feast called “Le Reveillon de Saint-Sylvestre,” with champagne and foie gras, and a fancy ball called “une soiree dansante.” Face it. We’ll never be as cool as the French.
• Ecuador: They see out the “Ano Viejo” by using wood, newspapers and rags to make human figures — often of disliked politicians — stuffing them with fireworks and setting them aflame. We call that an election campaign.
• China: Tradition has it that a scary, man-eating beast, Nyan, used to skulk down from the mountains, infiltrate houses and do its worst to the inhabitants. Then they discovered the monster was sensitive to noise. Which explains the firecrackers, banging drums and such that make San Francisco’s Chinese New Year Parade audible from space. (The next lunar new year, ushering in the Year of the Boar, falls on Feb. 18.)
• Cambodia: In “Chab Kon Kleng,” a traditional New Year game, one player, the hen, tries to protect his chicks while another player, the crow, tries to catch them. In America, the game is called “lobbyists and special prosecutors.”
• Japan: Tradition is to pay off all debts and go into the new year with a clean slate. This is how you can tell they’re not Americans.
• Ireland: In a tradition called “First Footing,” if the first person to set foot in your door in the new year is a dark-haired man, you’re in for good luck. But watch out if it’s someone whose eyebrows meet above his or her nose. This would seem to be good advice year-round.
• In Scotland, they have “First Footing,” too, but there, bad luck will follow if your first visitor is female, stingy, flat-footed, barefooted, a minister, doctor, gravedigger or thief or carrying a knife. Probably best to stay inside and watch curling on the telly.
• Korea: Tradition on “Seolnal,” the lunar new year, is to eat sliced rice cakes in soup; unexciting, but more appealing than the spring holiday of “Hansik,” when the menu calls for cold mugwort dumplings.
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
I got tons of quality gift items!!
Here are just a few of my favorite presents
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Friday, December 22, 2006
last minute gift card. I'm one of those wait until the
last minute angry shoppers - it's a sickness
the line wrapped around the inside of the store
and it had to be at least 95 degrees in this place
and then some lady in line is coughing all over everything
it sounded like she was about to cough up a lung.
all could think of was that movie outbreak
- remember when someone would cough - it would
show you the germs in slow motion moving thru the air
and other people breathing them in -
Then there is this girl behind me she looked like
a full grown Bratz Doll.. She kept saying how hot she was.
"I'm hot.." It's so hot" "I'm hot"
And she was standing 2 inches
away from me.. totally invading my personal space
I wanted to jam my elbow into her face
The line moved so slow - I was screaming on the inside.
it was agony
so FINALLY - it's my turn
My husband had been waiting outside the store
(it was in the mall)
he came over to the register
he said to me - ask the girl if they have any playstation 3s
Pfffffttt Nooooo, they don't have any
TIM: just ask
ME: *sigh* they don't have any
NOBODY has them
the girl at the register is looking at me smiling
ME: Do you have any PS3's?
Yes we have one..
with the 60 gig, Would you like it?
*look of disbelief on both our faces*
Yeah... I'll take it
"Most people don't ask"
So I got me a PS3
and I didn't have to camp out in a parking lot
or pay thousands on ebay
the down side...
I went into eb games to spend $10.00
I left with a $719.00 charge on my credit card
I think these dolls suck.
Labor group slams Bratz doll factory in China
The pouty Bratz dolls so popular as Christmas presents
are made at a factory in southern China where workers are
obliged to toil up to 94 hours a week, among other violations,
a labor rights group said in a report released Friday.
full story here
at the church's marriage marathon, the minister
asked Brother Ralph to take a few minutes and share
some insight into how he managed to live with the
same woman all these years.
"Well, I treated her with respect, spent money
on her, and I took her traveling on special occasions."
"For our 25th anniversary, I took her to Beijing, China."
are to all husbands, Ralph. Please tell the congregation
what you're going to do for your wife on your
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
of course I watched it AGAIN
I'm so glad Jonesy survives.
That would have sucked if Jonesy didn't make it
You know it's true.
"Final report of the commercial starship Nostromo, third officer reporting.
The other members of the crew, Kane, Lambert,
Parker, Brett, Ash and Captain Dallas, are dead.
Cargo and ship destroyed. I should reach the frontier in about six weeks.
With a little luck, the network will pick me up. This is Ripley,
last survivor of the Nostromo, signing off."
at Dunkin Donuts a long line...
and this bitch faced skank
comes storming in
<---I made you a visual -
she looked like this.
She practically knocks me over and says excuse me!
then she plows past everyone
goes over to the cooler
grabs a bottle of orange juice and proceeds to the counter
then she yells "How much is the orange juice?!?"
"How much is the orange juice?!?"
"I'm just buying orange juice!!"
(as if this makes it okay she just cut the entire line)
she pays for the juice and storms out..
Am I missing something?
is there some unwritten law that I am unaware of?
It's okay to cut everyone in line if you are buying orange juice??
This is one of those moments when I wished I had caused a scene
But no... I didn't speak up
I just watched.. I was too tired.. I had no fight in me
Why are people such assholes?? Does anyone know?
I hope she choked on her OJ.
*This has been another fascinating post from Casual Slack
A- Available or single? nope - but you knew that
B- Best Friend? Tim
C- Cake or pie? Pie of course
D- Drink of choice? Water, Iced Tea
E- Essential item I use every day. Toothbrush
F- Favorite color: Green
G- Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms? Worms
H- Hometown? Lincoln, RI
I- Indulgence: PIE
J- January or February? February - it's closer to spring than January
K- Kids and names: No Kids - Just cats Travis & Jerry
L- Life is incomplete without? Pets
M- Marriage date: June 27, 1999
N- Number of siblings: 1 older brother
O- Oranges or apples? oranges
P- Phobias or fears? Spiders
Q- Favorite quote? “Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight.” Albert Schweitzer
R- Reasons to smile: I have many
S- Season: Spring - Everything comes alive
T- Tag 3 or 4 people. 2fools & Mixednut (Leave in comments), Dirty Laundry & Chris
U- Unknown fact about me: I sneeze a lot - allergies
V- Vegetable you don’t like: celery
W- Worst habit: not putting away the laundry
Y- Your favorite food? Bagels
Z- Zodiac? Scorpio
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
You can make Santa do just
about anything you want.
Check it out:
"Try these: drink beer, belch, spit milk, jump over chair,
yodel, backflip, riverdance, splits, punch elf...
the list goes on and on and on. "
*thanks to Charles
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku
Hope I don't pick you
You wreck the secret santa
You smell - I hate you
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.
- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables
Monday, December 18, 2006
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Friday, December 15, 2006
It was my husband
He said - "Hi.. where are you? Are you home?"
"Yeah.. I'm home"
seeing how I don't normally
take our home phone on the road with me
Speaking of my husband
Here is yet another conversation we had last night
as usual he was in his sleep induced coma
So I shake him and say
- keep in mind he answers me while he sleeps -
Me: Roll Over
Tim: What Dog??
Me: No dog.. Just roll over
Tim: What Dog? NO
Me: **sigh** You... are... snoring.. Roll over
Me: Stop! - I can't sleep - You need to roll over!!
Tim: I did
Me: ROLL OVER!!!!!!!!!
Tim: No.. no dog
Me: There is NO DOG
Tim: No **followed by unintelligible mumbling**
He argues when he's awake
He argues when he's asleep
But amazingly enough still I love him ...
*please note this drawing is not completely accurate -
I sleep on the left side and Tim does not wear polka dot Pj's
I thought you all would appreciate this superb, evocative,
masterfully penned ode to the coming winter season.
So, grab a coffee, a comfortable chair, relax and
scroll down to enjoy the warm feelings and pleasure
that this wonderful poem will bring...
" ODE TO WINTER "
A poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre
Thursday, December 14, 2006
A BENIHANA CHRISTMAS
Michael sends out an inappropriate Christmas Card
which lands him in hot water with his girlfriend Carol.
Meanwhile tensions mount on the party
planning committee between Angela, Pam and Karen.
The resulting tension leave the office with
two competing Christmas parties.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
"casa de slack"