loathe...

I want to punch this CD in the face
Repeatedly..

I curse you AMERICAN IDOL
I CURSE YOU!!!!!
It's your fault this cd exists!!!!

FUCKERS!!!!!!!

Turn on a Radio.. go into a store

You'll hear it
there's no escape!!!!

So awful... so very, very awful

I am

Am I the ONLY

person in the world
WORKING today?

cat show

Joe Over at
joes foster dogs <---- Check out his site!
Made me this Slacktastic Slide Show
of Travis & Riley

Thanks Joe!

Check it Out - Here

cooking tips

My friend Ann
emailed me a nice recipe...


Jen this recipe is made just for you...
Make sure you read it to the end.

Here is a turkey recipe that also includes
the use of popcorn as a stuffing -- imagine that.
When I found this recipe, I thought it was perfect
for people like me, who just are not sure how to tell
when poultry is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out.
Give this a try.


8 - 15 lb. turkey
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good.)
1 cup uncooked popcorn
(ORVILLE REDENBACHER'S LOW FAT)
Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Brush turkey well with melted butter salt & pepper.
Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.
Place in baking pan with the neck end
toward the back of the oven.

Listen for the popping sounds.
When the turkey's ass blows the oven door open
and the bird flies across the room, it's done.

And, you thought you couldn't cook...
Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Happy Holidays Kids!

guest post

And now..
a guest post from
my good buddy
Angela A.K.A 2 fools

enjoy


June 15, 1983

Jen and I were reminiscing about the good times, which,
like pepper on an egg, are pretty far and few between...
My son's tenth birthday was yesterday and he said,
"I bet you don't remember what you got for YOUR tenth birthday, do you?"
I told him I was pretty sure I was always old and crippled and never
had a tenth birthday. The truth is, I did have a tenth birthday.
It was a birthday I'll never forget
(partly because our friend, Jen, won't ever let me forget it).

...you see... I had a special kind of dad. When I was a kid I thought
he was deaf because he was always yelling. My step-mom said it was
because he had a "hair across his ass" But, I know it was really because
he was very tired from the long hours he worked on the couch.
He was a pro surfer. Anyway, picture a white-haired, scowling, madman,
who rarely smiled (and rarely wore a shirt)
(Should we attach a picture, yes, lets)













So, the story goes that Angela had a 10th birthday party and
invited all of her little fifth grade friends, Jen included (because of course,
she was my best friend). I had a Carvel cake with a picture of Michael
Jackson's Thriller album cover on it (the side where he's in the white suit not
the other side.) That was about the girliest thing about this party, was that
I had a Michael Jackson cake. See, Jen and I were the "girly" types
back then...we didn't really play with dolls or whatever, we played with
electronics and drew Bixbies (cartoons) and make videos with the
PXL 2000, but we were NOT girly-girls. "What do you want for your
birthday" they'd said... "A Diamond-Back" I wanted that BMX bike so
bad I could taste it. You could ride it in the woods, ride it fast, go over
jumps...oh yeah, what I really wanted was a Diamond Back. So, yeah,
we're having this party outside in the backyard - having a blast I'm sure,
opening gifts and whatnot, and all I remember my father saying
"Angela - Get me a facecloth" and I'm thinking, "Jesus, buddy -
I'm entertaining guests over here, can't you get it yourself?"
But instead I say, "Why?" and he yells,
"GET ME THE FACECLOTH!!"
(which Jen said scared her, by the way)
So I go into the bathroom and open the shower curtain, and there,
before my very eyes is the most devastating present I could have
gotten on my tenth birthday, "Take it outside and show your friends"
I'm thinking, "Oh god. No, not that, please, anything but that."
and just as I'm doing everything I can to stall my embarrassment,
Jen walks in to see what's taking so long and sees my shame:

No, no, folks - it's the Diamond Back I so longed for, the bike I learned
the "Act of Contrition" for so that I could be sure all of my sins were
absolved before I prayed every night for it... instead, what lies behind
the curtain is none other than Benny's special of the week:
a 1983, Girls' Bike called, "PEACHES N' CREAM"
whose main attraction was it's HUGE banana seat sporting a picture
of a bowl of peaches, and giant chain guard with the same picture,
only this one had the bike's name written out in whipped cream,
"PEACHES N' CREAM". I thought I would die of embarrassment until
I look up and see Jen's face, who's practically in tears laughing at this
monstrosity rolling out of my back door, and instead of feeling bad for me,
she yells, "RIDE IT!" "RIDE IT! RIDE IT!" I had every excuse in the book
- but then was forced to drive this hunk of junk down the street in front of
all my friends and neighbors.

similar to this.
but peach colored..








If that wasn't bad enough, the god damned handlebars fell off while
I was riding it - throwing Jen into a fitted rage of laughter... Thanks, Jen.
Thanks for always having my back during the tough times.
I sure do appreciate your support. This is why I never called her from jail,
because she'd probably show up with Channel 10 and a dozen witnesses.
"SURE! I GOT YOUR BAIL MONEY
- I'LL JUST MAKE IT BACK WITH THE PICTURES
I'M SELLING TO THE ENQUIRER!" hahahahahahahahhaha


the end

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -

A Dirty Bathroom...
Please Clean Up After Yourself
I'm Not Your Mother

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

random find

"Take your fashion doll to the DISCOTEQUE"

click on pic for larger view

I don't know about you...
But I'm taking all of MY fashion dolls
to the "Discoteque"

Let's all go... shall we?

link of the day

Holiday Shopping Made Easy..
A 29-year-old guy from Memphis, Tennessee,
who weighs 530 POUNDS...
is selling a naked calendar of himself

chubbymikey.com

A Special Gift - for that Special Someone!
You're Welcome...

Clip of the Day

Clip of the day
Straight No Chaser - 12 Days
I heard this on the radio today..
It's from 1998 - But I never heard it until today
Maybe I should get out more?

if you haven't seen it - check it!

It's just Riley

I haven't posted any new kitten pics
in a while...

My husband sends me pics everyday
from his iphone

So I thought I'd share..

we LOVE this little animal

no reason

I just like this pic..
What are your thoughts?

trailer

Star Trek
Trailers
check em out
go here

photo shoot

yeah.. so
(me being the awesome photographer that I am)
Had a photo shoot with Santa today

What did you do today?

missed the bus

the sweet pickles bus
never stopped at my house
alas, I was too old..

I might have made it to an Ivy league School if it did..
I guess we'll never know

random find

I'm getting you this for Xmas...

random find

Suri Cruise says
"FUCK YOU"
"all You non-Scientology-Sons-a-Bitches!!"

random find

Hey, does anyone wanna come over tonight and

watch the Incredible Mr. Limpit?
I can stop by the video store after work...

No?
You're right... it's probably not as good as I remember it

OKay.. but you can't deny watching this movie
when you were 8 or 9 - and diggin' it!!
You CAN'T!!

thirty five

Well kids... today is the day
I officially become OLD
thirty five

Look what I got
from my pals at work!

click for larger view

This was some good cake! - Thanks Ann

(like the sticky note says..
you're the greatest person I know)

Ann made me these too! - She's a Culinary Expert
- See for yourself


Envy my goods!


And to top it all off - Angela A.K.A 2fools
Just emailed me the greatest poem ever written:

Happy Birthday, my dearest pal

for the friend you were and are right now.

When I needed you most, you were right down the street!

When my parent's starved me, your mom let me eat.

Milkbread and lemonade was all I had-

but dinner at your house was MEATBALLS AND SALAD!

We laughed at the table, your dad got pissed off

"YOU'LL CHOKE" he would say, "Now KNOCK IT OFF!"

Holidays were rarely a joy, so I'd trot down to your house

to make a gingerbread boy.

Remember the time we went to your Aunts?

"Let's go sledding!" you said, "Me in the back, you in the front!"

"OH SHIT!" I said. "This hill's too high, If we go down it, my friend, we'll surely die"

"Don't be a baby!" You evilly grinned, "I'll give us a push and then I'll jump in"

Off like a rocket we flew off the cliff, no way to steer, I was scared stiff!

"...you in the front" echoed again - "I'll kill her" I thought "once we get to the end"

But we squeaked through the branches of every white birch, escaped with our lives

and didn't get hurt!

We stopped dead on a stump and busted our rocket,

and laughed as we limped in the house for hot chocolate.

Oh the good times we shared, my best friend and I

I'm glad we both made it to see 35.

We're still just as cute and funnier still

and not a day more mature than when we were just girls.

We're older but wiser and still just as close - so raise your glass all you Slackers

and let's make a toast!

To The Greatest Blog of All Time, no writer can beat her!

Happy Birthday, Jen - from your best friend and readers :)

We love you!

Angela

picture pages

"Time to get your crayons and your pencils"

Go Here

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -
this week brought to you by 2fools



It's Victory Day
I don't feel victorious
Sitting at my desk

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

I'm prepared

This clip is for my husband... clicky here

Because I always say..
"I AM PREPARED LIKE A BOY SCOUT!!"
(Not a girl scout - all they do is sell stupid-ass cookies)

AND HE ALWAYS SAYS..

"NO ... YOU'RE NOT
You're NEVER prepared for anything"

- I disagree -

card

My friend Angela A.K.A 2 Fools

sent me this card... and I thought I'd share...

My birthday is two days away..
the big 3-5
I'm old now - I Don't know how this happened

Feel free to send gifts to make me feel better...
thanks

it's just dinner

my husband made lasagna tonight
and it was good

just sayin'

this just in...

They have already started
playing Christmas Music
on the radio station I
listen to at work...

nothing but holiday music
- around the clock - until December 25th

an email

the following is an email
I received this morning
from my friend Angela A.K.A 2 Fools

enjoy...

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!! This guy was on the right
of me pulling up to a red light, I saw his McCain bumper sticker...
pulled up next to him and did the "HA - HA" from the Simpsons
HAHAHAHAHAHA He just looked at me like "WTF!??" LOL
I am wearing all red white and blue today - because it is the FIRST
TIME IN EIGHT YEARS I AM PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!

FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST! THANK GOD ALMIGHTY,
FREE AT LAST!"

"Check out Mia's Shirt
I made that shirt this morning for her with a blue and red marker.

No more BUSH!"

link of the day

cool link...
Thrift Store Adventures

check it out - here

blue

***Can I get a BLUE STATE
HIGH FIVE!!!!!***

To those of you who waited in lines to vote
I thank you

random find

hope

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -



WORK: creates SADNESS
Crushes our sense of freedom
We weren't meant for this!!!

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

who is voting?

Okay Kids..
it's POLL TIME!
Needless to say - I will be voting for the
Democrat tomorrow
Just wondering what your plans are

VOTING DAY POLL
	McCAIN!!
	OBAMA!!
	NOT VOTING!
Free polls from Pollhost.com