Thursday, July 31, 2008


Cpl. Dwayne Hicks
(or Kyle Reese if you prefer..)
is 52 today

- "Remember: short, controlled bursts."

Wednesday, July 30, 2008


Harry Potter 6

go here


May the power of funny bones compel you.

in the news

Cheesus Found
>>A High Ridge, Mo., woman says she has found Jesus in a bag of Cheetos.
She bought a bag of a local convenience store, and inside the bag
she felt something unusual. "I looked at that and I thought,
`Oh my that looks like Jesus on the cross.` It was just like wow," she says.
Family and friends agree with her. Her daughter says,
"I thought it was pretty cool."
But Kelly Ramey`s friend, Sue Edelman, sees something different.
"I looked again and I thought a horse head."
Kelly says her husband has a special name for it. "He calls him Cheesus."
The pastor of Kirkwood United Methodist Church
does not see anything theologically special about the Cheeto,
but thinks some good could come from it. Pastor David Bennett says,
"If people can find Jesus, somehow, in each of us like she`s found in this object,
that would be a wonderful thing." Kelly doesn`t plan to sell the Cheeto
and will keep it in a safe deposit box.<<

She's gonna keep her cheeto in a safe deposit box...

Tuesday, July 29, 2008


Elmo Prank Call
Elmo calls a pharmacist

clicky here


I wonder if there's a "Jet Pack Club"
for jet pack enthusiasts

I bet there is...


Bush or Batman
Are these quotes from the
U.S. president Bush or from
the action figure Batman?

go here



Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku -

Waking up for work
Prozac, Vodka, Xanax, Weed
None of these things help...

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

Monday, July 28, 2008

just some pics

It's my weekend...

My friend Jo-Ann (who wishes to remain anonymous)
had a party on Saturday
She dresses like this all the time...

I brought Jello Shots...
Because there's always room for Jello Shots!


1 package lemon Jello
2 packages lime Jello
2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
1 can coconut milk or juice - I used juice
2 cups coconut rum
2 1/4 cups water

(I accidentally added 3 cups of water
but they still came out ok)

Bring water to the boil and remove from heat.
Slowly stir in the 3 Jello packages, then add the water,
the coconut milk or juice, and the lime juice.

Wait 3-4 minutes and stir in the rum.
Pour into individual serving sized or
plastic shot glasses and chill.

Her Dog Bailey - He didn't have any Jello

My husband in the pool
with "Shadow" the greatest dog I ever met

I want a dog
But I only want this dog
and I can't have him...

How was your weekend?

Saturday, July 26, 2008

random find

Who has this on their Ipod?

Friday, July 25, 2008

this just in...

You know what I hate
I Hate Deer Ticks

Fucking Useless - Spawned in Hell
Disease Carrying - Sons of Bitches


The first stage of Lyme disease is
called early Lyme disease.
Early Lyme disease usually causes one or more
of the following symptoms that occur days to weeks
after infection:

• Fatigue
• Chills
• Fever
• Headache
• Muscle and joint pain
• Rash
• Stiff neck

yeah.. I had all of this
It was the worst three weeks of my entire life
- I do not recommend getting this disease

So I'll finish taking my medicine -
and hopefully I'll never experience these symptoms again

I did end up getting a rash where it bit me..
It was behind my knee - apparently most people get bit there

So kids,
the moral of the story

If you go in the woods.. or the brush.. or high grass
ALWAYS Look behind your friggin' knees!!!
- because ya never know

the end

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Wednesday, July 23, 2008


"A Treasury
of Macrame Owls"...

go here

clip of the day

You've probably seen this before
It gets me every time!
*wiping tears from my eyes

watch it here

trip to the store

We just went to the store for
milk and bread...

New Blueberry Mini Wheats?
I'm all over that...!
I ate some this morning -
Product Review: I like them a lot!

I bet your supermarket doesn't have an ample supply
of Autocrat Coffee Milk Syrup

Just Sayin'


When Cakes Go Wrong

*thanks Marni

Tuesday, July 22, 2008




Last week
I was home sick with my painful mystery illness
(Which by the way - I'm still waiting for the lyme test results
but I feel 99% better!!)

I was on the couch
in pain

I slept most of the day..

But at one point I woke up
and I'm lying there - lifeless
staring at the tv

the remote was on the table
but I felt like such shit
- I didn't even have the energy to get up
I think it was on HBO

And you know what was on tv?
You know what shitty movie I had to endure?

"Mr. Holland's Opus"

yeah... I know

Like I wasn't being tortured enough
with my painful mystery illness.. NOW THIS!

for a hour and a half... I suffered on

My cable bill is immense- and this is the kind of movie they play??

THEN My husband comes home from work and says

"Uhhhh, what is this shit you're watching?"

Me: "I'm not really watching it - it's just on"

Tim: grabs the remote - hits the menu to see the name of it

Me: "I'm not really watching it - it's just on"

Tim: "You' ll watch anything"

Me: "I'm not fucking watching it
by choice!!
Do you think I honestly wanted to
watch Mr. Holland's Fucking Opus
Nooo I didn't - So shut the hell up!!!"

Tim: "No, you shut up"

Me: "No, YOU shut up"

Tim: "No, you shut up"

Me: "Honey, can you get me a snapple out of the fridge"

Tim: "Yes"

Me: "Love you"

Tim: "uh huh.."

the end

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku - better late then never

I'm tired today
Don't want to work anymore
Planning my escape...

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

Monday, July 21, 2008

just some turkey

click on pics for larger version

Saturday, July 19, 2008

10 bucks

A liquor store in town was having a yard sale
in the parking lot - selling all of it's promotional stuff..

And looky what I scored for 10 bucks
wooo hooooo

It's a Mike's Folding Table
Pretty Sweet

If only it was Lime - Then it would have been perfection

Friday, July 18, 2008

reading material

So I go for my blood work this morning..

And I'm in the waiting room

there's this woman

talking really, really loud
Talking about whatever was on tv
for instance:
"Oh, this is a cute dog, but the trainer is
an idiot!! It's not the dogs fault
the trainer is a moron!"

Basically, It was a never ending ramble of nonsense

And no one in the room is answering her
every body's really quiet.. a few people would smile and nod..

Now people start leaving the room, getting called one by one
and all that's left is me and the crazy

So I scramble to look for some reading material
and all that was in the waiting room was:


you've got to be fucking kidding me

Parenting and Surfing!?

I mean - who is the asshole
in charge of stocking the waiting
room with reading materials?
A Surfing Soccer Mom?

How about a newspaper?? or a TIME Magazine
Hell, I woulda been happy with a readers digest for fucks sake


I noticed a "Family Circle" wedged between two of the chairs
and I went for it.. and proceeded to read about "pumpkin carving"
for 20 minutes...

I held the magazine right up to my face
- and prayed she wouldn't talk to me... she didn't

**sigh of relief**

the end

nice things

these two little gems
sit on my co-worker Jo-Ann's desk
she got them as a Christmas present one year
from me and another co-worker

I take the time to shop for people
and buy them nice things
because, that's how I am...

Thursday, July 17, 2008


You know I don't like fast food...
the only thing I would ever consider eating at McDonald's
is a McBreakfast...maybe a McBagel

But I did want to mention my new discovery of
McIced Coffee
It's Really McGood

Frankly - I was McShocked.

I always envision McDonald's Employees to be so
into their jobs
that they "Mc" Everything while at work

"Hello Mr. Johnson it's a McBeautiful day today, sir"
"I need a McRaise"
"Can I get some McOvertime"
"You need to refill the McKetchup"
"I McQuit!!!"

just some travis

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

random find

I remember buying flash cubes

Just some weekend pics

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku - better late then never

Mystery illness...
I only have Five sick days
I need fifty more!

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

Monday, July 14, 2008

health update

health update

yeah.. I still feel like shit

I went to the doctor today
she said..

sounds like Lyme disease,
but it might not be..."

someone help me,

she gave me some doxycycline and sent me on my way -

I'm going for blood work on friday, kids..she circled just about every
goddamn test on the paperwork
to get to the bottom of my painful mystery disease

so I'm guessing they will need to take about 8-9 pints from my body
I think that's all the blood I have

I might die just from giving blood
pray for me

On a side note:
doxycycline label says to avoid the sun
Avoid the Sun??????

can it get much worse?

What the hell am I - a fucking vampire?

Thursday, July 10, 2008

a conversation

I'm at Walmart last night..

I look down at the shopping cart
and there's three cans of pringles lined up perfectly in a row
I look at my husband
His face - beaming with joy & excitement
and he says..

and I quote

I was just gonna by one can..
but then I FOUND THIS!
He whips out a piece of paper from his pocket

with his arm stretched straight out
he holds the paper about 1 inch from my face

and there before me was a coupon for
**brace yourself**

"20¢ OFF"


He replied.. "I know"

I then said...
"so, I notice you didn't ask me If I wanted a certain kind
of Pringles knowing full well..
I don't really like the honey mustard variety.."


"Why? Why wouldn't you get one I like"

"I only have a limited time
see.. it says right on the can
limited time
honey mustard"

"I need to eat as many as I can - while I can"

"time is limited"

the end

ps. they ain't that good
just sayin'


my friend Kim
emailed me a pic of her new kitten "Odie"
and I thought I'd share

Awwwwwwwww He's a cutie ain't he!

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

at last

I wanted to post this last week
but as you all know - I've been a bit under the weather

June 27th, 2008
at approximately 5:45 eastern standard time
my husband presented me with a package
wrapped in red and gold metallic paper

A gift?
For ME?
but.. I didn't get you anything...

He responds: "Just open it"

But what is it?
Why did you get me something?
We don't do the anniversary gift thing..

He responds: "Just open it"

- I proceeded to unwrap -

and then I see it

It was the gift I have been waiting for
for over 25 years

The gift I wanted as a kid
but never got

you know the gift In which I speak of

yeah, that's right...

It's a snoopy fan-fucking-tastic
snocone machine!

I felt like running up the mountain side
and holding it above my head to show the village below
like that scene in the lion king

it's just as beautiful as I had envisioned it
in all it's plastic glory

I'm buying a shelf for it..
and maybe one of those spot light things...

on a side note
the following day I went to see my mom
she presented me with a package..
yeah.. she bought me a snoopy sno-cone machine too
What are the odds? I wait 25 years - then get two in the same god damn week

So, some of you are probably thinking - if you wanted one so bad
why didn't you just buy one yourself?
Answer: It's not the point..

the end

Tuesday WORK SUCKS Haiku

And Now...
the Tuesday Work SUCKS Haiku

This Weeks Haiku
is brought to you by 2fools

A Video Haiku!! - Clicky Here!!

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.
or send me a video haiku!

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables


Hi Kids
sorry for my lack of posts...
I have been sick all week

and when I say "sick"
I mean - near death

Every muscle and joint in my body - complete agony

It started with a pain in my back
then the pain spread all over

I went to the emergency room on Saturday
after waiting 3 1/2 hours I learned

I don't have Lyme disease
but I might have Lyme disease

and It might just be a virus
but it might not be...

and I should wait another week to see if goes away

oh.. and we don't want to give you any real pain killer
because then we wont know if you're getting better

here's a prescription for ibuprofen
have a nice day

Doctors are just a wealth of information - don't ya think!
and I had to pay $25 to learn nothing

I feel a little better today

My vacation sucked - and that makes me sad

Did you miss me?