Friday, March 31, 2006

Even More - Random Useless Facts!


- Thirty gallons of water is used for the average shower in the U.S.

- Mosquitos are more attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas.

- The Egyptian pyramids were once faced completely with marble.

- Nabisco stands for National Biscuit Company.

- Baby robins eat 14 feet of earthworms per day.

- The earth is 4.5 billion years old.

- 70% of dust of house dust is dead skin cells.

- A rat can go longer without water than a camel.

- A gold fish's memory span is three seconds.

- Most hamsters blink one eye at a time.

- The only bird that can fly backwards is the Hummingbird.

- Ants dont sleep

According to Useless Fact of the Day

Saturdays

Tomorrow is Saturday My favorite day of the week!
I remember when I was a kid Saturdays meant morning cartoons followed by "Creature Double Feature"

This was way back... when television sets had knobs and you actually had to get up to change the channel!
*Imagine the horror*

Creature Double Feature was on WLVI Channel 56. (that's UHF kids...)
Classic horror movies with Boris Karloff, Lon Chaney Jr.
and Bela Lugosi. It also showed the full range of old Godzilla movies
and B-movies from the late 1940's – 60's.
These movies are unquestionably CLASSIC!
I loathe todays horror movies.
Just mindless graphic violence and butchering.
- Not my idea of a good time.


Godzilla was no doubt my fave!
The bad acting... the bad voice overs. Priceless!


I think I'll netflix some of these movies! - Bring back the memories.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Stewie doing the - "it's friday dance"

MySpace Layouts


this site has free animations
bigoo

Generation X - hey that's me.

Generation Xers — Born 1965 to 1980
"Generation Xers are technologically savvy, having ushered in the era of video games and personal computers during their formative years. But witnessing skyrocketing divorce rates, their parents being laid off after years of dedicated service and challenges to the presidency, organized religion and big corporations instilled a sense of skepticism and distrust of institutions. Because they don't expect employer loyalty, they see no problem changing jobs to advance professionally.

In contrast to the baby boomers' overtime work ethic, generation Xers believe that work isn't the most important thing in their lives. They're resourceful and hardworking, but once 5 o'clock hits, they'd rather pursue other interests."

According to this Article >The Generations in Today's Workplace<
click me

In my opinion, the 80's sucked
I hated the clothes, the music
I hated it All.
I'm so thankful I was born in '73,
that way my college years
weren't during the 80's
- That would've sucked...

Now the 90's were cool.
You know they were!




A friend emailed me this -
You might be a child of the 80's if:
• 3 words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?
• the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories
• You've recently horrified yourself by using any one
of the following phrases:
- "When I was younger"
- "When I was your age"
- "Because I SAID so, that's why"
- "What the HELL is this noise on the radio?"
• Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English language
• You ever used the phrase "don't make me angry...you wouldn't LIKE me when I'm angry" when trying to frighten someone off.
• You know who shot J.R.
• You remember the original version of Windows: Macintosh.
• You remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever possibly get better special effects than those in the movie TRON.
• This rings a bell: "and my name, is Charlie. They work for me."
• You'll always hold a special place in your heart for "Back to the Future."
• You know what a "burnout" is.
• A predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid"

heaven & hell

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Made it myself.

Make your own
South Park Character
(This is old.. but it's still good)

Go here southparkstudios
then click Create-A-Character now!

There's some good flash games too...
great for boredom. Check it out.

these make me laugh...

If bad words offend you, I recommend closing your eyes.

Money well spent.


This is the DFX Metal Detector.
I bought it a couple of years ago. I cost me about $1,000.
Sure, they have models that cost $200 But nope,
I had to have the best one.
I had to have the shiny one with all buttons and lights.

It’s a sickness
Anyone who knows me, knows I have to buy the best one
and I if can’t afford the best one I have to have the next best one.

Friends call it the $1,000 paper weight the $1,000 coat rack,
the $1,000 clothes hanger... and so on, you get the gist..

These days I keep in thrown in the spare bathroom shower
just to get it out of the way. Recently my husband found Travis, our cat
curled up on top of it taking a nap.
*great*

Anyway
I had some loose change on my desk this morning
and it reminded me of the DFX.

I probably used it about 5 times total
and when I say “I” - I mean my husband would walk around with it
(I don’t want to carry that thing, it hurts my arm)
and when it beeped I made him dig the hole.
I pretty much just stood there and waited anxiously for him to unearth that box of diamond rings and gold coins that I had envisioned finding.

Here is a list of what I actually found
• Rusty Nails
• Endless Pull Tabs
• Bottle Caps
• Wire
• Chunks of Unidentifiable Metal
• Cans
• Did I mention Pull Tabs..
• Couple of Quarters
• One Indian Head Penny (I was actually excited about that one)
• A Dime


Yeah, so it was definitely worth the thousand bucks...

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

"unofficial" episodes

No Star Trek shows on TV or Movies in production and the Geeks are restless... "Obsessive fans" have begun making "unofficial" episodes.

Yeah, and I bet they're really good too...


I'm no expert, but I think a Star Wars fan - Could kick a Star Trek fans ass any day. But I could be wrong.


See fox news for the Full Story

Random Useless Facts



Why post random useless facts?
- WHY THE HELL NOT.
Just be thankful you have
something interesting to read.



•Today is tommorow's yesterday. Today is yesterday's tommorow.

•Ancient Egyptians shaved off their eyebrows to mourn the death of their cats.

• The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the
"General Purpose" vehicle, G.P.

•A typical double mattress contains as many as two million house dust mites.

•Women reject heart transplants more often than men.

•At the turn of the century, most lightbulbs were handblown, and the cost of one was equivalent to half a day's pay for the average U.S. worker.

•Humans are more closely related to chimpanzees than African elephants are to Asian elephants.


According to Useless Fact of the Day

Sell crazy someplace else...

Check out this post
about Katie Holmes
Click Me

They look like they
could be brother & sister,
don't they?
They both have that
CRAZED smile.
I think they're creepy.
Scientology

Monday, March 27, 2006

Superman is Coming, Everyone Look Busy.

Superman Returns
Opens June 30
Wow, he really does look completely different when he puts on a pair of glasses. Unrecognizable!

**sigh**

Starring Brandon Routh... WHO?
I dunno.

OKay, OKay... It actually looks pretty good, check out the trailer:
WATCH TRAILER

the spiders are back

a·rach·no·pho·bi·a : An abnormal fear of spiders.
Now, I wouldn't call it ABNORMAL.

Spiders are spawned in hell.
I have an agreement with the spiders.
You stay away from me, and I let you live.
I know, I know.. they are good ...
They kill bugs that are bad.
But the agreement still stands. Don’t come near me.

Well, Spring is here... and with that comes spiders.

A tarantula sized spider was waiting for me on the dryer door last night.
I was minding my own business doing laundry, and there it was... invading my personal space.
WHAT ABOUT THE AGREEMENT??? You must die.

I’m almost paralyzed with fear of this nasty creature.
I look around frantically for a weapon...at the same time not taking my eyes off the invader, because once you take your eyes off it- It escapes. The nearest thing in reach - a roll of paper towels It will have to do

I take aim - I smash
He drops... HE RUNS??!!

NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Under the dryer he flees. Now he’s wounded and no doubt looking for revenge. What if he makes his way to the clean laundry basket and takes up residence in one of my socks?

I have to finish this job.

I’m on my hands and knees trying to look under the dryer. I see him.. He sees me. He’s pissed.

I grab flat metal sign that was in the basement I slide it under and proceed to smash with all my strength.

He escapes AGAIN now he’s heading straight towards me.
- I must destroy him

I grab the paper towels and with every last bit of energy left in my body I lunged the roll downward.

VICTORY

Did I feel bad? A little. But we had an agreement.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Old Cemetery


Went for a walk through this old cemetery not too far from my house.
It had that old, New England, Steven King feel to it.
Got some good shots. Some of the stones dated back to the 1700's
Thought I'd share...
(Click to make bigger)






More Pics

Friday, March 24, 2006

Thursday, March 23, 2006

what dick wants


the Smoking Gun posted the vice president's
hotel room requirements

Caffeine-Free Diet Sprite...
Guess he's trying for a trim, girlish figure.

And it's hard to turn on the TV ...
Better get someone to turn it on for you Dick.

Leprechaun Sighting in Alabama


this...you have to see
CLICK ME


from
gorillamask.net

Charlie has a Theory

Charlie Sheen
has been quoted as saying the following:
"It seems to me like 19 amateurs with boxcutters taking over four commercial airliners and hitting 75 percent of their targets, that feels like a conspiracy theory. It raises a lot of questions,"

"Just show us how this particular plane pulled off these maneuvers . . . It is up to us to reveal the truth."

"The collapse of the Twin Towers looked like a controlled demolition."


I will listen to other peoples theories on a conspiracy... BUT I'm not listening to Charlie Sheen

Note to Charlie: Go have another cocktail with your favorite stripper... Leave the thinking to the smart people, thanks.

Thursday is the Gateway to FRIDAY

It's Almost Friday Kids
Can I get a "HELL YEAH!"

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler...


"It's not okay because if they take my
stapler then I'll set the building on fire..."

Why don't people get their own office supplies?? I'm sick of it.

Everyone is always stealing shit off my desk.

They all come in coughing and sneezing an blowing their nose
THEN they use MY phone and take MY stapler.

Is there no office etiquette? Is there no common courtesy?
I'm sick of it.

NOTE TO OFFICE STAFF: Don't touch my stuff, thanks.

Because sometimes, peas can be scary.

IN THE NEWS TODAY





FOR MORE NEWS AROUND
THE WORLD GO TO
ananova

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

the COLTS?


You Suck...
How could You?
How could you go to the Colts?

Adam Vinatieri = Traitor
One who betrays one's country, a cause, or a trust.

***Have Fun with Peyton***


jerk

Just Another Blonde Joke

My Friend Emailed Me This Blonde Joke Last Night
And I Thought I'd Share...



A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car
and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug
through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like?" she finally asked.

The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to
the policewoman.

"Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying,
"Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

It says I need to relax.


apparently,
I've been putting far too much effort into trying to be a superhero...
get yours

love... exciting and new

I posted how it was
"Captain Stubings"
Birthday
a few weeks back
and it gave me this vision...
RE-MAKE!

we'll call it
"LOVE BOAT Puerto Vallarta Nights"

Starring
Kurtwood Smith (from that 70's show)
as Captain Merrill Stubing
"Gopher, you're such a DUMBASS"
George Clooney as Doctor Adam Bricker
Steve Zahn as Purser 'Gopher' Smith
Samuel L. Jackson as Bartender Isaac Washington
"What do you want to drink Motherfucker?
Say it again! I dare you, I double dare you!"

Sarrah Jessica Parker as Cruise Director Julie McCoy
Emma Watson (from Harry Potter) as Vicki Stubing

Co-Starring
• Bruce Willis
• William H. Macy
• Angelina Jolie
• Bernie Mac
• Oprah Winfrey as the ships photographer

What's Better than That???
I Smell a HIT!

It's so bad...It's GOOD.

Leave me a comment if you have a better casting idea.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Thursday, March 16, 2006

still growing


Check out the Tomatoes... They're actually GROWING
I'm so proud of myself.
But then again, 8 more weeks until spring.
Anything could happen in 8 weeks.

There's a certain cat
that would like very much to put
an end to the growing process.
He may look innocent...

But he's not.

I want one.

I ROBOT
was on HBO last night.
I don't know about you, but I could
really use one of those NS-5 fully
automated domestic assistants.

"I'll take dinner on the couch tonight, thanks.
And while your at it... the windows need cleaning,
oh and did you make my bed?
Don't forget the laundry...
Oh, and feed the cats.
Hey did you re-stock the fridge?
Did you vacuum in here yet?
The room isn't gonna clean itself ya know."

Why can't the future be NOW dammit?

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

morning coffee




I went to Tim Hortons
for my Iced coffee this morning.
There was a line.

There’s this freakish couple at the counter.
I’m assuming it was husband and wife..
The guy had thick glasses, thick unkempt beard, mustache, bad hair
wearing brown cords and tan walking sneakers. Yeah, he was hot.
Then we have the “wife” frizzy hair, dim-witted expression, dirty stained red coat.

So the guy is standing there, just staring at the donuts as if this decision is the biggest decision of his life.

I think to myself.
JUST PICK A FUCKING DONUT!!! JUST PICK ONE!!! DO YOU WANT ME TO PICK IT FOR YOU???
LEMON!!! NOW MOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!

The wife is walking back an forth looking up at the menu.

I take my two dollars out of my pocket
Because I’m “Ready to Order” A Quarter falls out of my pocket in the process.

It makes that clangy change falling on the floor sound.

Apparently this sound awoke dirty red coat out of
her menu induced coma
She turns and heads straight for the quarter.

I think for a split second .. well maybe she's going to hand it to me.

WRONG

Dirty red coat picks up MY Quarter and then begins to place MY quarter into HER dirty red change purse

SHE STOLE MY QUARTER

I PANIC...no way... that’s MY QUARTER that I need to BUY MY COFFEE that costs $2.05

I look at her and say... “I think that’s umm...”

She looks at me and says
“OH is that yours?? I drop change all the time.”

Why am I not surprised that she drops change all the time.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Have you seen this?

OKay,
It's 9:15pm
I'm chillin' out on the couch.
Life is good.

I switch to channel 11 and see this kid


and he's Singing "Part Time Lover"

It was horrifying.
I'm gonna have nightmares.

It was bad.

latin name: faticus caticus


He's known as
"BIG J"
he's extremely unpleasant
Not to mention
paranoid, overweight, and
not very bright.
Just look at him...
that pissed off attitude
I think the word
"SOUR"
pretty much sums
him up.

Don't go Chef...



Say goodbye to Jerome "Chef" McElroy on South Park

Singer Isaac Hayes has parted ways with the Comedy Central series "South Park," citing the series' "inappropriate ridicule of religious communities."

TRANSLATION: He's mad because they made fun of Scientolgists and he happens to be a Scientolgist.

OH, BOO HOO Isaac Hayes, don't be such a wuss.

That's the idea of South Park!
The premise is as long as you can make fun of everybody, then everybody is a potential target.
When you start holding back punches, than the show's reason for being... sort of gets compromised.

some people suck

So I’m driving home from work yesterday and experienced an unpleasant event
I work in Providence, I take Rte. 10 to Rte. 95 South

So I’m on Rte. 10 minding my own business. I look over to my left and there this shit box type car with two punks in it (I don’t recall the make or model) but I know it was a piece of shit. So I look over and they're smiling. I think to myself ... what the hell are these jackasses looking at. I glance in my mirror again and there's ANOTHER shit box car driving BETWEEN us..

This is a 2 lane road mind you!

I instinctively jerk the wheel to the right -
I almost lose control of my truck. This little white hatch back with the loud muffler chugs by me, It wasn’t even FAST it was just loud and ugly.




I responded with a powerful 2 handed middle finger salute followed by a stream of profanities.

I could have lost control of my truck and gotten killed.
It could have caused a major accident.

And for what?? So these morons can prove who has the faster piece of shit car during rush hour??

I prayed both cars would veer off the road, hit a pole and burst into flames, but needless to say that did not occur.

I hope Karma catches up with them.
I’ll keep my fingers crossed.

Monday, March 13, 2006

SOLD

Well kids,
You missed out.

It's officially sold
and now on it's way to its new home in Davenport, Iowa

Sure, I would have liked more money
but the fact that I don't have to look at it anymore is reward enough.

It was okay.


Watched Lord of War
over the weekend.
It was a lot better than
"the Weatherman"
Plot outline: An arms dealer (Cage) confronts the morality of his work as he is being chased by an Interpol agent.

I like Nicolas Cage.
When I was 14 years old I thought Raising Arizona was the greatest film I had ever seen in my life.
HA!




Okay, so the guy is only famous because his uncle is
Francis Ford Coppola. - So what.

Okay, so the guy was once married to Lisa Marie Presley
(the same woman who let Michael Jackson touch her) - That's just wrong.

Okay, so he named his son "Kal-el" after superman. - Yeah, that's pretty lame-ass

Aside from all that...
I still like him.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

He Makes Good Potatoes


My Husband Makes
"Wicked Good Potatoes"
How Does He Do it - You Ask?
Get Some Potatoes
Sweet & Regular. Cut Them Up

Coat them with Olive Oil

Add Some Salt, Pepper, Paprika, Garlic Salt, Italian Seasoning, Little Bit of Oregano & Sweet Basil, MIX IT UP. Put It In a Pan Drizzle More Olive Oil. Put in Oven at 450 for 45 Min

Get Them Crispy
MMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Potatoes

Don't Miss Out On This Quality Dining Experience.

It's Yellow.

Tim Got a New Motorcycle
It'a Kawasaki ZR7S

I'm not that Impressed
with the Silly Bike.

But Whatever.
**Yawn**

Friday, March 10, 2006

Are there ANY Good Movies?


I Netflixed The Interpreter
and it absolutely, positively
SUCKED
I wanted to like it, I tried to like it,
But it just went on and on and on
It was almost painful to watch

That's all I have to say