Patches the Horse
go here

take the test

"Nerd Test" I'm Only at 28%
were do you stand? click on the pic

I found this over at From Sushi To Samurais

My State is Thinner
than Your State

five states with the highest obesity rates
Mississippi, Alabama, West Virginia, Louisiana and Kentucky

five states with the lowest obesity rates
Colorado, Hawaii, Massachusetts, Rhode Island and Vermont

haha!

Is it Friday Yet?

Is it Friday Yet?
it's a 3 day weekend kids
and I can't wait!!

Here's the weather forecast
Oh well...
It's still better than working for the man

Things I plan on doing this weekend:
• Go See Little Miss Sunshine
• Sleep Late Everyday
• Relax
• Have Fun
• Drink some Mike's Hard Lime
• Make Popcorn
(My mother bought me a popcorn popper I HAD TO HAVE
2 years ago, and it's still in the box)
• Eat Pizza
• Take Some Pictures
• Blog about my Weekend Extravaganza

Woo Hooooooooo!

Simpsons Voices
Another Simpsons Link..
this one is funny!

Check it out

The Simpsomaker
go here

What's Yours?

Your Monster Profile

Death Destroyer You Feast On: Fried Twinkies You Lurk Around In: The Empire State Building You Especially Like to Torment: Republicans

What's Your Monster Name?

Tuesday Work Sucks Haiku

And Now...
The Tuesday
Work Sucks
Haiku




Ringing telephone
Can someone else answer it?
I think you all suck

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

HORRIFIC clip #2

I can't believe how bad
this next clip is...

This is the 2nd most
horrific clip ever


I couldn't believe my eyes...
How can something be THIS BAD????
Variety Hour??? This was a show? People watched it????
How can this be?? It's like a nightmare from hell...

watch it - if you dare

**If you start to feel nauseous or
dizzy while watching - shut off immediately

possibly one of the most
HORRIFIC clips
I have ever come across
go here

**If you start to feel nauseous or
dizzy while watching - shut off immediately.


This clip should have a warning label
It's that BAD
the 80's were just so awful... so very, very awful

No way -will you make it through the entire clip
If you do... You are a stronger person than I

boring toy flashback

Remember VIEWMASTER?
I spent hours staring into this boring as hell chunk of plastic
There was nothing better to do..!
watch the clip

If you gave kids this toy today
they would probably throw it at you.

Apparently they still make it
check out these new fancy versions - here

My favorite “reel” was a preview reel
it wasn’t even a story
it was like an advertisement for other reels I didn’t own
I still remember it!
It had an ad for Spiderman reels, King Kong reels
The Six Million Dollar Man,
Some Cartoons, I think...
and scenic Travel pictures!
How do I remember this stuff???
Out of all the stacks of reels I had
I like the advertisement one the best HAHAHA!

Then they came out with the
TALKING VIEWMASTER - WOW!

I wanted this BAD
But did I get it??? - of course not!
My parents used the famous line
"You don't want that..."

I don't?

the Office

I don't normally watch award shows
or follow who wins what... Because I don't care.
But this morning I read that
the Office Won an EMMY for BEST COMEDY

YAY!
funny clip here

weekend

We went camping with some friends
down near the beach.
It was a good time

The sleeping part wasn't fun...

Our site was too close to the road
All night long the sound of - traffic

It felt like we were sleeping in the
breakdown lane of interstate 95

AND it was windy as hell
I thought the tent was going to fly away

Then at around 5:45 AM the site next door
thought it would be a good idea to let their kids run around
and SCREAM at the top of their lungs for an hour.
that was nice

Why do some people let their kids continuously scream?
Do they not hear it? I don't understand...

Other than that - A good time was had

And that's my weekend...

Just some outdoor photography
for your viewing pleasure...
click on pics for larger view

I'm not drunk

America's
Drunkest Cities
PROVIDENCE, RI
Ranks #10
Another reason to
make me proud to live
in the ocean state.
Hmmmm
I wonder if I have any
Mikes Hard Lime left in the fridge?

compelling... dynamic...
Friday Nornna
HAhHAhahaa

click it!

Springfield

AN INTERACTIVE VERSION OF
THE MAP OF SPRINGFIELD
Home of the Simpsons Family

Go Here!

Tim Burton
is 48 Today

- Pee-wee's Big Adventure
- Beetle Juice
- Edward Scissorhands
- Sleepy Hollow
It's ALL GOOD

He's currently working on Sweeney Todd -
Starring Johnny Depp (of course)
(infamous story of Benjamin Barker, a.k.a Sweeney Todd, who
sets up a barber shop down in London which is the basis for a sinister
partnership with his fellow tenant, Mrs. Lovett. )

Travis - not sitting still

it's just pizza

We tried a new pizza place tonight...
it was pretty good -
as you can see -I went with the white-pizza

Tim went with the steak sandwich
I tried to take a picture, but it was like taking away
meat from a hungry pit pull
I didn't want to lose any fingers, so you'll have
to live without the picture

It didn't look that great anyway

There's no good take-out in my town
and I'm sick of it

Just sayin'

New Blog In Town

There's a New Blog In Town
sans pantaloons

and since he dedicated
his Blue-Beak the Chicken post to me
go read it
I'm dedicating this one to him!!
He made this kick-ass chicken ad - and I love it
HOW CAN YOU NOT?!?

I predict - this Blog will be great...

so please go visit Andres & tell him the Slack sent you
and to keep the posts coming

is it just me?

Did you ever drive to work and zone out so much
that when you get to work you don't have any
recollection of the ride there?

Sometimes I scare myself...

Shatner
Roasts Back

go here

The SLACK
DID A GUEST POST TODAY!
over at
my blog is about nothing

go read it... HURRY go...
it's my first guest post so you have to go read it

Why are you still here??
go...
While you are there make sure you add his link
to your favorites or your blog!

But then come back, I miss you.

Guest Post

And now ladies & gentlemen

a guest post from Mr. Dick Small

Miss Jen has asked me to do a "guest post",
and I'm SO honored.
Usually I'm asked NOT to show up, so this is certainly
a thrill for me, let me tell you! I didn't know what to post,
so I thought I'd introduce you to a few of my family members.

This is a picture of my nephews: Rob and Bob,
and my nephew Todd. They all live in Kentucky.

Rob and Bob work at Radio Shack.
They've been there since high school.
We actually didn't think they'd be able to keep a job for this long,
but it seems to suit them.
They are the sons of my cousin Cletus and his wife Starla.
I don't see much of them these days.

Todd has worked for several years as a Walmart Greeter.
He's been doing it for about 6 years now.
He's a son of Cletus and Starla also.
He has a slight amphetamine dependency, but in a way it's
been a blessing because he's able to work double shifts alot.
He's such a good kid!

Once again Jen, I want to thank you for allowing me
to participate on your blog. Big hug!!

River Phoenix
would have been 36 today
if it wasn't for
drug-induced heart failure... that is
that's a damn shame
I always thougt he was the coolest
when I was a kid



at least we still
have Joaquin
until he decides
to drunk drive
himself into a tree

morning coffee

I don't know what it is about morning coffee

but these people are constantly giving me material for posts

I don't make this shit up
the following is a conversation I had this morning
with the Tim Horton's Cashier

I go up to the counter

Counter Girl: Hi
Me: Hi can I get a medium hazelnut iced coffee,
milk 2 sugars, light
Counter Girl: Sure, Cream?
Me: NO..Milk, Light
Counter Girl: I'm making chocolate cream pie today
Me: (Blank stare followed by pause...I'm thinking is she talking to me?
Why is she telling me this? What does pie have to do with anything?) What's That?

Counter Girl: I'm making chocolate cream pie today
Me: pause... wow.. that's cool
Counter Girl: yeah, I'm really excited
Me: uhuh
Counter Girl: It's my first time making chocolate cream pie
I've always wanted to, but I never have.
Me: uhuh
Counter Girl: It's going to be super yum - I CAN'T WAIT!

These are the thoughts going through my head:
Why the hell is she telling me this? Does she think I said something about pie?
Is she even talking to me? Super Yum??? - Is she kidding??
What is the point of this conversation? How do I reply to this?
Maybe she's "mentally challenged" she looks normal.. she can't be normal
and why isn't she getting my coffee???
I'm totally baffled...

Me: So does this mean you've been promoted or something?
Counter Girl: no
Counter Girl: I love chocolate cream pie but Tom won't eat any,
he's a dumb dumb

I'm thinking...Who the fuck is Tom?

Counter Girl: turns around and smiles at this tall dopey looking kid
I'm guessing this is Tom

Tom just stands there with an annoyed look on his face

Counter Girl: gives me my coffee - (about fucking time)
Have a nice day and wish me pie making luck
Me: uhuh.. good luck with that

ARE THESE PEOPLE ON CRACK OR WHAT??

previous morning coffee posts
coffee1
coffee2
coffee3

religious pj's

Check out this post
at JIMSMASH!!!

All I can say is ...wow!

Tenant Time

It's Tenant Time
This week - Pointless-Drivel.com
Yeah, I know
I've never heard of it either...

This blog hardly gets any traffic
I feel bad for the guy

He gets 4.. maybe 5 hits per week
it's really sad

So go click on his thumbnail
over on the right
Lets try and boost his morale
tell him the slack sent you

poor guy

this just in...

They really are magically delicious...

clip here

I know you guys have probably
been sad because I haven’t posted
any Nornna
She’s been posting 10 minute clips
that are far too long!
but I found some fascinating short
clips I know you’ll love...


1.nornna eating cereal
2.nornna swing
3.nornna going for a ride & smiling
4.nornna getting ready & singing

Mariah is afraid of
PICKLES...
They are ruining her life.

watch it

What's cooler than
getting a call from
Samuel L. Jackson...
not much

courtesy of ned!

go here

And Now...
The Tuesday
Work Sucks
Haiku


What do you want now???
Can you give me a minute?!!
You aggravate me....

Thank You
If you have an I Hate Work Haiku Please Post as a Comment.

- the first line five syllables
- the second line seven syllables
- the third line five syllables

I came across this myspace
on my friends myspace
and had to share it

Apparently he is the
ROCKINGEST ROCKER

It's Crazy
I like it Check it out


Here is the new slack myspace - want to be my friend?
you know you want to... add the slack today!

I'm not a big fan of myspace.
I only have it to leave comments on my friends that do.

5 things

5 random things
I am positively certain I will NEVER Do

I WILL NEVER:
1. Line Dance - BWAAAHAhahahHAHAHAhah hahah haa
2. Play Paint Ball - I just don't get why people enjoy this
3. Be a Bridesmaid - Never, ever again - So don't ask me
I won't do it - fuck that
4. Go to a Broadway Musical - No chance in hell -
you'd have to duct tape me to the chair
5. Buy Yoplait Strawberry Yogurt Again - Yeah, I'm all set with
the crushed up beetles, thanks anyway - nice of you to list them
on the label - jerks

Isn't that the best name..
I won't get my hair cut there...
but I still like the name..

just sayin

flashback

flashback

I don’t know what made me think of this
it just popped in my head like most of my flashbacks do

I don’t remember what year it was
sometime in the early 80’s

I had gone to a classmates birthday party
as a party favor I was given a pack of puffy stickers
It was woody woodpecker and friends..

I was quite pleased by this gift

When I was a kid you appreciated stuff like this!
I wasn’t showered with gifts on a daily basis like kids are today
now a days most kids are so spoiled - not all - but MANY -
and get so much stuff they don’t appreciated shit...
they just want more and more and more
and their parents give them whatever they want.
It’s actually kind of sad - because they will never value anything
I’m veering off the topic aren’t I...

okay - anyway - as I was saying
I was so mesmerized by this great gift I had just received!
I went home and showed my mom
she said.. “that’s nice”

Later that night I went to bed
I placed the stickers on the side of my bed across from my
pillow so I could look at them before I fell asleep

I wake up the next morning and I see in front of me
just the white card that they came on..
NO STICKERS??!?!?

Then I notice in the corner of my eye
woody woodpecker stuck in my hair... I pulled it out
It hurt like hell.

Then I felt the back of my head
more stickers...
AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I spent the next 20 minutes
painfully pulling each sticker out of my hair
and placing it back on the white card

How the hell did they ALL get stuck in my hair
there had to be atleast 12 of them on that card
What he hell was I doing in my sleep??!
THE ENTIRE PACKAGE - STUCK TO MY HEAD - WTF?

The stickers were still sticky
and I was able to salvage all of them

but still... it was tragic.

It was a tragic puffy sticker incident.

I don’t remember if I told anyone
If I did tell my mother she probably just said
“that’s nice”
Because nobody ever listens to a god damn thing I say..

and that’s my flashback

The 5 Most Obviously
Drug-Fueled TV
Appearances Ever

right here