Tuesday, August 01, 2006

the other day we went to
Walmart

I don't like going there
I think Walmart smells like dirty grease
so I prefer Target

But Walmart is closer to the house and
we just needed a few things

I'm pretty much preoccupied with my thoughts
most of the time
(I know it's hard to believe)
So I don't notice a lot of things.

Anyway, I go get some toothpaste I come back
I toss it in the shopping cart and my husband says to me
with a disgusted look on his face...

Tim: Did you see that?
Me: What?
Tim: What do you mean what?
Me: What?
Tim: MAN you ARE OBLIVIOUS!!
Me: WHAT????
Tim: That thing...
Me: What are you talking about? What Thing??
Tim: 'It' was standing right in front of you!
Me: I didn't see it..
Tim: You have to see it

He drags me back down the aisle..
Nothing is there

Tim: It can't be far, go this way

We come around the corner and this is what I saw
picking out some Cheetos

I tried to reconstruct what we saw
using various bits of clipart & the magic of photoshop

The pic doesn't quite do it justice..
Her hair was much more greasy and
she was in desperate need of soap
But the red & black cowboy boots
with torn off denim shorts are right on target...

I can't recreate her smell... it was bad.

This is why I avoid Walmart

15 comments:

Teri said...

I'm with you Jen. I haven't stepped foot in a Walmart in a few years. Now I shop at Target. The Walmart by me had narrow isles, rude ass people and hillbillies to boot and I live near some well-to-do towns so I don't know where these people came from.

Maybe they're from upstates New York?

Teri said...

BTW, the girl is nasty!!

monkey said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Dale said...

Looks like the head greeter from my Wal*Mart.

Jen said...

HAHAahAh!

Jim said...

Yes, avoid WalMart at all costs for many many reasons.

Funny thing is, she looks almost like some of the people I see on Venice Beach. Man, Venice is weeeird!!!

:)

Annie said...

Hahahahahahhahahhahahahahaha!!!!!!Wow... I went to Walmart today too. I did'nt see anything that nasty though.
Btw, did IT smell like dirty, greasy scalp???? You'll know what I'm talking about if you smelled it. It's everywhere lately. uggggg. =)

Annie said...

Btw, your photoshop skills never cease to amaze me. That's killer.

Lynda said...

I love Tarjay also. I try to avoid Walmart at all cost. Though they do have cheap canned goods.

Lynda said...

I think Tim needs to get you a camera phone. Or a small digital camera. Really.

Jen said...

I know!
I keep saying I need a mini Digital..

All I have is a BIG SLR Digital
and You can't put that in your pocket!

See the stuff I'm missing out on..
An actual pic would have been far superior

MC said...

Is it me, or does that look like Britney Spears in about a decade?

Mr. Fabulous said...

I am so aroused right now...

Scarlet said...

Terri Hatcher really lets herself go in between tv seasons!!

Jen said...

HAHAhA!