Friday, July 18, 2008

reading material

So I go for my blood work this morning..

And I'm in the waiting room

there's this woman

talking really, really loud
Talking about whatever was on tv
for instance:
"Oh, this is a cute dog, but the trainer is
an idiot!! It's not the dogs fault
the trainer is a moron!"

Basically, It was a never ending ramble of nonsense

And no one in the room is answering her
every body's really quiet.. a few people would smile and nod..

Now people start leaving the room, getting called one by one
and all that's left is me and the crazy

So I scramble to look for some reading material
and all that was in the waiting room was:

• PARENTING
• SURFING

you've got to be fucking kidding me

THIS IS THE READING SELECTION??
THIS IS WHAT A HOSPITAL HAS TO OFFER?
Parenting and Surfing!?


I mean - who is the asshole
in charge of stocking the waiting
room with reading materials?
A Surfing Soccer Mom?





How about a newspaper?? or a TIME Magazine
Hell, I woulda been happy with a readers digest for fucks sake
IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR??

WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!

I noticed a "Family Circle" wedged between two of the chairs
and I went for it.. and proceeded to read about "pumpkin carving"
for 20 minutes...

I held the magazine right up to my face
- and prayed she wouldn't talk to me... she didn't

**sigh of relief**




the end

14 comments:

alybeth72 said...

Yeah, thats when you get desparate and start reading pamphlets on arthirtis, erectile dysfunction, or insomnia!

Hope your tests come back okay for your mysterious illness! Keep us posted.... we all care!~

Jen said...

lol

thanks Alybeth
I actually feel much
better today!
Maybe the doxycycline is
kicking in..

I'll keep ya posted
for sure

=)

M@ said...

Would it kill some office to get the International Herald Tribune or The Economist or a literary magazine? Enough with the Family Circle.

Anonymous said...

Maybe you're pregnant. Maybe the Parenting magazine being one of the only 2 mags in the room was a sign... maybe you're carrying quintuplets.

Anonymous said...

... and maybe they'll turn out to be surfer potheads...

mixednut said...

Lots of places to surf in Rhode Island are there? Never would've guessed.

Annie said...

Maybe it was a sign you should take up surfing or better yet maybe you should get pregnant if you're not already carrying the quintuplets...

SkylersDad said...

I have actually had the same thing happen to me, and been forced to pick up a Cosmo and read it.

I did pretty good on the quiz though...

Anonymous said...

Hahahaaa. And the quiz was: "Are you a Vixen or a Doormat?"

Anonymous said...

Classic post!

We think alike.

Bob said...

I took Mrs Nobody to the doctor on Monday, they only had women's magazines. It was ridiculous!

Then I remembered we were at the women's health center.

Mel said...

Well, as an expert at spending time in docs waiting rooms I have to tell you....always take your own reading material!!!! You always have something to read and you dont pick up whatever bacteria and viral crap other people left when reading that magazine.

Hopefully you wont be spending much more time in waiting rooms, I hope you get better soon!!!

Dr Zibbs said...

I hate tha sometimes there are mags and the address is torn off like I'm really going to track the person down. Just to even things up I steal it and mail to a random doctor in te practice with the words, " I'm watching you" (in blood of course)

Micgar said...

I've had similar things happen-sucks huh?! You're like please please, "don't talk to me!" Those mags have to be the worst choices ever!